IKEA Furniture
Sonic
Sonic the Hedgehog exists as a living repudiation of physics. The blue blur achieves velocities that would reduce ordinary hedgehogs to aerodynamic paste, yet emerges unscathed and, inexplicably, still wearing his gloves. His canonical top speed approaches 768 miles per hour, the speed of sound itself, a feat that renders him essentially a mammalian fighter jet with attitude. The Spin Dash technique allows acceleration from standstill to supersonic in approximately two seconds, a performance metric that would make Formula One engineers weep with inadequacy. This is not mere speed; this is velocity as a philosophical statement.