Coffee
Coffee delivers with extraordinary consistency, performing its primary function billions of times daily without significant variation. The global supply chain ensures availability in virtually every location where humans gather. Coffee can be relied upon to provide its effects within established timeframes, with predictable dosage relationships. Its infrastructure of production, distribution, and preparation has achieved remarkable resilience against disruption. When one requires caffeine-mediated consciousness adjustment, coffee delivers without drama. This dependability has made it the foundation of morning routines worldwide, a substance upon which entire civilisations have learned to rely.
The Joker
The Joker's fundamental purpose is to be undependable. Relying upon The Joker for anything represents a category error of spectacular proportions. His entire philosophy rejects the concept of dependable outcomes, predictable behaviours, or sensible expectations. One cannot schedule The Joker's appearances, anticipate his methods, or count on any particular outcome from engagement. This unreliability isn't a flaw but rather the core product offering. The Joker depends upon being undependable, which creates an interesting logical paradox but poor practical utility. He has never arrived on time for anything, possibly because time itself represents an order he refuses to acknowledge.
VERDICT
Coffee's global infrastructure of reliability enables daily function for billions. The Joker has elevated unreliability to philosophy, which makes for fascinating villainy but poor morning routine integration.